if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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