it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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