I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
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Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
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