people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
whose parrot is this?
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
