He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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