I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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