yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
