i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Randomize
