Can i not drive my cunt home
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
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