Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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