mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
