Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Randomize
