If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize
