Please, let me fuck your mom
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
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