Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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