I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Randomize
