ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's great music for shaving your balls
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
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