she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
