The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Randomize
