Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Randomize
