i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
as a side note pls kill me
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
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