would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
