Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
We have started to decorate penises.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
