tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
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