Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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