Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize
