A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
