The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
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we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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