so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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