She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
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naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
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did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
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