if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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