had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Randomize
