I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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