i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Randomize
