I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Randomize
