This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
