Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
