Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Randomize
