Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Randomize