Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Randomize
