let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Randomize