ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Randomize
