I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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