yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
