I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Randomize