I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
