He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
