porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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