I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
