This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
