your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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