do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Randomize